Psychology Help Hotline


"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline."


If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line.

If you are dyslexic, press 6969696969.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic-stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."

Make sure to check the wikipedia entries to learn more about the previous psychological disorders.

8 Responses to "Psychology Help Hotline"

♀ L's brain ♀ (visit their site)

1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 :P I am obsessive-compulsive! lol this is the cutest hotline :) by the way how do u upload more than 5 images to a post? i don't know how to do that.

♀ L's brain ♀ (visit their site)

oooh now i know how! :P 1 1 1 1 1 1

Transparently (visit their site)

And the obvious questions asks itself, what the hotline number? :P Cute post.

Fonzy (visit their site)

lol.. i like the short term memory the most:) this is a hilarious post!!

DiiGMaa (visit their site)

Smart/funny post.. Quite entertaining.. thanx for the laughs :)

Bella Color (visit their site)

LoooooooooooooooooooooooooL...!! Its hilarious!!! :D

r u a psychology student or what?!

Angelo (visit their site)

@L's Brain & Laialy: So both of you girls are obsessive-compulsive. Interesting

@Transparently: Thanks for the compliment and the phone number would be (666)999 9999...Okay, I don't know what does that mean but probably the Devil will answer LOL :D

@Fonzy: Welcome to my blog, and thanks for the compliment and for stopping by ^_^

@Diigma: Welcome Hun and thanks for smiling back...cute avatar btw.

@CeCe: Ahhh...I see we have a multiple personality condition...so I assume the one is commenting is the male side of you LOL

@Bella: Glad you liked it Bella, and as a matter of fact, I am a psychology major. I have mentioned that wayyyyyyyyyy back in my old posts...Psychology is FUN ^_^

Erzulie (visit their site)

I couldn't read your post because the colors hurt.
What happened to your old cooler display?